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Beyond Reason: Using Emotions as You Negotiate | |||||||||
 
| 80% Recommended by our customers. Publisher: Viking Adult Catalog: Book Release date: 2005-10-06 Media: Hardcover Format: Bargain Price Number of pages: 256  Tip: compare prices with similar booksAuthors:
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 Written on October 4, 2006 Summary: Using Emotions In Negotiation & Mediation This book by Fisher and Shapiro shows the versatility and brilliance of the Harvard Negotiation Project. After decades of teaching us that negotiation and also mediation is a matter of focus on "process, interests, needs and substance" we are now told that emotions have a unique and powerful influence upon the negotiation and the results of the negotiation. Emotions are extremely hard to quantify and they are surely not rational. Emotions come, they are there; they are physiological and psychological reactions to environmental situations. These things are not just reactions to physical environment; but they are in fact, very much reactions to things that are said and ways that they make us feel. In this book, Fisher and Shapiro try to help utilize emotions in the negotiating process by giving a framework on which to base the use of emotions. The framework is simple, because there is only so much time one can invest in this monitoring and still focus on substance. Nonetheless, the model is useful and should be taken seriously. The model is based on the negotiator or mediator having an awareness of 5 critical core concerns that are basic to all human beings. These core concerns are as follows: 1) Appreciation 2) Affiliation 3) Autonomy 4) Status 5) Role Fisher and Shapiro take great care to define these terms not just with words, but with truly wonderful examples of how each aspect affected a real life negotiation. This thereby gives the Negotiator or Mediator a good feeling of how this framework can be utilized in practice. If the Mediator/Negotiator is attuned to these 5 core concerns and meets them with confidence and empathy, the potential for successful outcome is much greater than would be if these factors were ignored. The book is highly recommended for any person who does a lot of negotiation and/or mediation. Written on August 13, 2006 Summary: Terrific book on dealing with emotions in negotiations This book by Roger Fisher and Daniel Shapiro has rightfully won a prize offered by the International Institute for Conflict Prevention and Resolution for the best book on negotiation. The book focuses on the important role emotions play in negotiations and offers a practical framework for dealing with them constructively. Throughout the book Fisher and Shapiro present recognizable examples, ranging for day to day situations we all encounter to political negotiations with huge impact for millions. For me, the most interesting part of the book is were the authors explain five core concerns -- appreciation, affiliation, autonomy, status and role -- and their effect on decision making. They provide sensible advice on how to use these concerns as levers to keep negotiations constructive. Here is a quote from the book giving you an example: "Perhaps the most powerful way to soothe someone's emotions is to appreciate their concerns. There are three elements in appreciating someone. You want to UNDERSTAND the other's point of view; FIND MERIT in what they are thinking, feeling, or doing; and COMMUNICATE the merit you see." I think that is a terrific way to put it! The content of this book is one thing that makes it worthwhile. Another reason why I like it is that it is exceptionally well-structured. I like it when authors do their very best to make it as easy as possible for readers to understand their core messages. Fisher and Shapiro succeed very well in this. Written on July 11, 2006 Summary: Practical & Insightful Framework for Negotiations Negotiations guru Roger Fisher has teamed with Daniel Shapiro to offer a valuable new perspective to the world of negotiations. For those in business, Emotions might not seem an obvious source of valuable data, yet they are. The authors provide 5 areas of core concerns which may be at issue during a negotiation. Those 5 areas provide a useful check list: appreciation, affiliation, autonomy, status and role. Two recommendations about how to work with this list of core concerns stand out. One is to check with yourself first, to see if one of your own core concerns has been upset, as that may inform you about why your own reaction has become intense or anxious. This self-awareness can vastly improve effectiveness. The other surprising recommendation is to notice the emotion but speak to the concern beneath the emotion, to address what's at stake for the person. In other words, be aware of the emotion but alleviate it by addressing the concern. They offer good clear definitions of terms, useful examples, some of which are humorous and even personally revealing by the authors. It can be read straight through and accessed again later for negotiations which have you stumped. For those familiar with Myers-Briggs, it's a great model for bridging the decision making dichotomies of "Thinking" and "Feeling". The model appeals to logic, expertise and precedent, as well as affiliation and appreciation. Written on April 13, 2006 Summary: How to use emotion to negotiate For a fine treatise on effective negotiation, consult BEYOND REASON: USING EMOTIONS AS YOU NEGOTIATE: it maintains that emotions DO matter, especially when negotiating with an angry person in turn, and then shows how to fine-tune these passions into outlets which motivate people. Use his analysis of 'core concerns' to understand and generate desired, helpful emotions in self and others and understand how the emotional tone of the discussion often sets negotiation possibilities in a title which clarifies professional responses and how to employ emotions to turn conflicts into opportunity. Written on March 30, 2006 Summary: This book will help you become a better negotiator! BEYOND REASON: USING EMOTIONS AS YOU NEGOTIATE by Roger Fisher and Daniel Shapiro had me hooked from the very first paragraph when it gave examples of situations that we all have faced at one time or another . . . the first involved a customer backing out of an agreement before the final document gets signed, the second had a car dealer telling a customer that his new car engine wasn't covered under warranty and the third had an 11-year-old telling you that she wasn't going to wear her coat on a cold winter morning. Typically, rather than being rational in our negotiations in these situations, we turn to anger and behavior that does not help us get what we want . . . a large part of the reason behind this is that we don't take into account the five key emotions that are most critical to productive negotiations: appreciation, affiliation, autonomy, status, and role. By considering these, Fisher and Shapiro contend that we'll be far better negotiators--and the other side will feel better about the process, too. What really made this book so meaningful for me was the fact that the authors used so many actual situations, either that they've been through or that others have experienced . . . these ranged from work situations to marital discord and included attempts to find peace in the Middle East . . . a final chapter featured guest commentary from the former President of Ecuador, Jamil Mahuad, who explains how he applied interest-based negotiations theory to highly charged negotiations between his country and Peru on a border dispute in the late 1990s. There were several memorable passages; among them: * If you find that you have stopped listening to the other person, ask yourself, "Am I done or are they done?" In other words, have you prematurely stopped listening to the other person-perhaps because you are tired of listening to them or are uncomfortable with the emotions they are expressing? * Make yourself indebted to the other. Benjamin Franklin suggested that doing a favor can help build a link between you and another. Rather than doing a favor for other people, however, he suggested that you let them do a favor for you. Borrow a book or otherwise ask them for a small favor that is easy to grant. You become indebted to the other person, and that person feels both generous and connected. * Meet in person rather than via phone, computer, or e-mail. Personal distance is better reduced by face-to-face conversation than through e-mail, letters, or the telephone. Once you get to know someone in person, it is easier to avoid stereotyping that person or misattributing ideas to them. Whether a negotiation involves Israelis and Palestinians, labor and management, or a landlord and tenant, face-to-face negotiation helps to humanize each of the parties and provides a greater depth of context. When people meet you in your office, you may want to avoid having your desk become a barrier. Former Secretary of State Dean Acheson regularly got up from behind his desk and moved to a chair near that of his guest. Roger has his desk facing bookshelves on the wall so that he can easily swivel his chair and greet a visitor who is promptly invited to sit nearby. Without a desk between you, it can be easier to build a personal connection. |
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| Catalog | Book | Book | Book | Book | Book | Book |
| Release date | 2005-10-06 | 1991-12-01 | 1993-01-01 | 2000-04-03 | 2007-12-26 | 2006-05-02 |
| Media | Hardcover | Paperback | Paperback | Paperback | Paperback | Paperback |
| Format | Bargain Price | - | - | - | - | - |
| Number of pages | 256 | 200 | 208 | 250 | 272 | 320 |
| Ean | - | 9780140157352 | 9780553371314 | 9780140288520 | 9780553384260 | 9780143036975 |
| Book Isbn | - | 0140157352 | 0553371312 | 014028852X | 0553384260 | 0143036971 |
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