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Parenting With Love And Logic (Updated and Expanded Edition) | |||||||||
 
| 80% Recommended by our customers. Publisher: Pinon Press Catalog: Book Release date: 2006-06-05 Media: Hardcover Number of pages: 271 Ean: 9781576839546 Book Isbn: 1576839540  Tip: compare prices with similar booksAuthors:
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| Need help with your kids? Learn how to parent with love and logic and be amazed at the great results! Now with a new look and updated content, readers will enjoy passing along this best-kept parenting secret to their friends. |
| User Reviews: |
 Written on March 19, 2008 Summary: Great Love the concepts and book ~ a real must read ! Some suggestions seem to be far fetched but the book gave me tons of valuable inputs and I guess everybody should implement only the strategies they strongly believe in anyhow.  Written on March 4, 2008 Summary: I like the theory, NOT their execution I borrowed this book from the library and have just finished reading part one. I will admit first that I am the product of what the authors call "helicopters," so some of the ideas in the book are unusual to me. In general, I like the idea of natural consequences, enforcable choices, and encouraging children to think through their problems. I can see myself using these principles with my own daughter, but not always the way the authors do it. Some of the sample dialogues in the book are reasonable but many do not sound as genuine and empathetic as the authors imply. Some of the examples in the book and in the "pearls" are making me very upset. In one case, a child has been neglecting her dog by not feeding it, so the mom just gives it away with no warning and without confronting the girl about it. The authors admit this is a really tough approach but that's how kids learn that unless you take care of your health and your animals serious illness or death can result. Now this sounds crazy to me. In our home, we think of pets as a family responsibility, so that might be one difference. Still, wouldn't it teach the girl more about empathy to sit her down and say "you can either come up with a schedule and feed the dog or we are giving it away, you have one week to improve." Why do these authors feel that giving someone a second chance is a bad thing? It seems this might teach her "if I don't fulfill my responsiblity, someone else will take care of it for me." Another example is a mom who asked her son to do something and he mouths off and refuses. So the next day when he asks for a ride she says, yesterday you showed me that asking nicely can be ignored, so I'm not going to drive you to your activity, even though you asked nicely. Isn't that just being petty and/or spiteful? That's a great lesson for your kid. A third example is a kid who blows his lunch money and allowance on a carnival and has no money for lunch at school. So he asks his dad if he can make a lunch from food in the fridge. The dad says, yes, but you have to pay for it because I already gave you money for lunch once. Really? Your kid offers to take responsibility to make his own lunch all week and you are going to charge him for it? I'd think remembering to make lunch everyday would teach him the lesson. I agree to not giving him more money, but charging for the food in the fridge sounds stingy - won't he learn that as part of the lesson too? I think it is possible for kids to learn self-reliance with this method but some of the examples just sound like the kids would end up feeling like their parents are not willing to help them out without significant groveling. It sounds as though a Love and Logic parent is not supposed to give advice or help a kid work on the solution, or not until the child has time to ponder it and slink back to ask for help. I'm not advocating parents do the solving, just help, like talking it out with them or brainstorming. I thought helping others is an important value to teach our kids (not being doormats, being a sounding board to say "what do you think would happen if you used that solution?"). This seems to teach "I'm genuinely sorry you have a problem but it's still yours." Nice. I just wonder if some of these examples I've listed would make the kid feel like their parents view them as impositions or that the parents really begrudge them something. I realize that how you do it depends on the age of the child, but some of this still seems pretty harsh the way the authors do it. In some cases I don't think that helping them is equal to bailing them out. The examples sound like the parent says "I know you will come up with a solution" and then they just walk away. I greatly prefer How to Talk so Kids Will Listen and How to Listen so Kids Will Talk. It also emphasizes consequences and letting kids make choices and solve problems themselves but it shows you how to do this and keep talking with them at the same time. If Love and Logic is a turn-off for you, consider reading this other book before throwing out the consiquences/choices method entirely. Written on February 29, 2008 Summary: New insight and Understanding for those Helping Couples I have just finished reading the book, "Parenting with Love and Logic," by Foster Cline and Jim Fay. Because I am interested in going into the field of Marriage and Family Counseling, I found this book to give me new insight and understanding in working with couples dealing with parenting issues. So many people struggle with effective parenting, and I like the approach this book gives. The author's goal is to help parents raise responsible kids that feel good about themselves. They begin by discussing ineffective parenting styles, and so many of us may see ourselves within those styles. They continue by giving a new model of parenting in which children are responsible for their actions and have logical consequences to each action. Children must know and understand these consequences, and be free to choose their own actins and accept responsibility for what they choose. Kline and Fay talk about the concept of self-esteem and building a child's self-esteem. They bring up a great point between the difference between praise and encouragement and how to use the mistakes children make as opportunities. I appreciated the chapter on setting limits and thinking through words as parents. The authors challenged me to say what I think and mean what I say, instead of making empty threads. They advocate gaining control through logical consequences and giving choices. Finally, this book ends with what they term, "Love and Logic Pearls," where they discuss various situations and what the practical view of love and logic is in each situation. For example, dealing with anger issues, money, fighting, bedtime, tears, toilet training, temper tantrums, etc. (Cline & Fay, 2006).I found these to be extremely valuable resources and I have used them in my own parenting. I plan to use the concepts in this book as I counsel others. Because I have found these things to be effective myself, I can stand behind these wholeheartedly and explain them to my clients with confidence. Online Counseling and Telephone Counseling could be a useful way to help struggling couples. To learn how to provide Online Counseling and Telephone Counseling, try this excellent clinical guide: The Therapist's Clinical Guide to Online Counseling and Telephone Counseling: The Definitive Training Guide for Clinical Practice (review by Ginger Ernst) Written on February 26, 2008 Summary: Excellent Read!!! This book is incredible! Wow! This book has already changed the relationship between my headstrong daughter and I! Incredibly life changing - for both of us and she now feels like she has a little control in making decisions for her life! HIGHLY RECOMMENDED!!! Written on February 8, 2008 Summary: Every parent should read this book A have learned so mucho from this book. It is easy to follow and interesting. |
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| Our price | $16.49 | $16.47 | $16.49 | $5.95 | $14.07 | $12.21 |
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| Collectible price | $24.99 | $24.95 | - | - | $23.00 | $17.95 |
| Catalog | Book | Book | Book | Book | Book | Book |
| Release date | 2006-06-05 | 2002-12-01 | 2006-05-31 | 1994-08-30 | 2000-10 | 1995-03-01 |
| Media | Hardcover | Paperback | Hardcover | Paperback | Paperback | Paperback |
| Number of pages | 271 | 175 | 316 | 112 | 226 | 399 |
| Ean | 9781576839546 | 9781930429000 | 9781576839300 | 9780944634035 | 9781930429024 | 9780944634486 |
| Book Isbn | 1576839540 | 1930429002 | 1576839303 | 0944634036 | 1930429029 | 0944634486 |
| Link to shop* (opens in a new window) | BUY IT NOW* | BUY IT NOW* | BUY IT NOW* | BUY IT NOW* | BUY IT NOW* | BUY IT NOW* |
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