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Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew | |||||||
 
| 60% Recommended by our customers. Publisher: Delta Catalog: Book Release date: 1999-10-12 Media: Paperback Number of pages: 240 Ean: 9780440508380 Book Isbn: 044050838X  Tip: compare prices with similar booksAuthor:
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"Birthdays may be difficult for me." "I want you to take the initiative in opening conversations about my birth family." "When I act out my fears in obnoxious ways, please hang in there with me." "I am afraid you will abandon me." The voices of adopted children are poignant, questioning. And they tell a familiar story of loss, fear, and hope. This extraordinary book, written by a woman who was adopted herself, gives voice to children's unspoken concerns, and shows adoptive parents how to free their kids from feelings of fear, abandonment, and shame. With warmth and candor, Sherrie Eldridge reveals the twenty complex emotional issues you must understand to nurture the child you love--that he must grieve his loss now if he is to receive love fully in the future--that she needs honest information about her birth family no matter how painful the details may be--and that although he may choose to search for his birth family, he will always rely on you to be his parents. Filled with powerful insights from children, parents, and experts in the field, plus practical strategies and case histories that will ring true for every adoptive family, Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew is an invaluable guide to the complex emotions that take up residence within the heart of the adopted child--and within the adoptive home. |
| User Reviews: |
 Written on May 30, 2007 Summary: Danger Will Robinson! And to all the pre-adoptive & adoptive parents who live in outer space! If the truth scares you--please DO NOT READ! You may suffer from buyer's remorse and your "purchase" may have feelings that do not mirror yours. It's true! Face it, you have entered into a social contract where the product/child did not have a choice--and suffered a terrific loss. No matter which way you slice it. Some reviewers say the author makes "sweeping generalizations". Of course she does. Just like a book on addiction makes generalizations about addicts--most are true. Ms. Eldridge does too. The adoptive parents (most of the one star negative reviewers) are kidding themselves. If you think these aren't issues for your children, then you're monsterously self centered, and your "good" relationship with your child is a sham. For the APs who give it good reviews, bless you for your compassion. You're good parents indeed. Written on April 11, 2007 Summary: Adoptive Or Biological Child I just bought this book because I am in the process of adopting a 5 month old baby girl. I wanted advice on how to talk to her when she is older about her being adopted. However, I found while reading the book there is allot advice that can be used when dealing with your biological children as well. I was not adopted but find the whole fear of abandonment was something I felt as a kid and wish my parents had some of what is in this book to of help me overcome my fears. If you are adopting a child or already have I really recommend this book!! It is very smart on the advice it gives to you and I think someday when my adoptive daughter needs words to express to me what she wants and needs to understand I can hand it too her and tell her, no holds barred, I am here for you and you can ask me anything. What I don't know I will help you find the answers too.  Written on February 22, 2007 Summary: Skip this one This book seems more like a cathartic memoir of a woman's painful adoption experience rather than an unbiased helpful guide. As another reviewer wrote - who are her sources? Are they unbiased or did she seek out those with equally painful experiences? It doesn't seem to be a balanced or objective study. I couldn't even get through a third of this book - the melodrama put me off. I've read many other superior books dealing with adoption, loss, grief and attachment disorders. Written on January 12, 2007 Summary: A must-read for adoptive parents As an adopted person and a counselor, I would highly recommend this book to adopted people, adoptive parents, and those who work in the field of adoption. Some of it is very difficult to read because of the emotional nature of the content, but it is so honest and truthful that it cannot be ignored. As painful as it may be to try to understand some of the more difficult aspects of the family of adoption, not attending to them is to choose not to fully understand ourselves and our children. Eldridge gives excellent examples and specifically explains things that parents can do to foster growth and self-awareness for their children.  Written on November 20, 2006 Summary: Yes it is a bit scary but... I understand that the writer is explaining things from her own perspective and she clearly explains that some of the issues mentioned in her book may or may not apply to every case. As a newly adoptive mom I liked the book because it tells you the many many things that you could do wrong and it prepares you for what could be the worst case scenario. I agree that probably many kids or parents would not face all these problems but even if only one appears, then the bookd would be helpful. The one thing I do not like about the book is that it was written thinking only in adoptions in the US, for example in my country there is no such thing as open adoption, all adoptions are closed adoptions. But in overall I liked the book because it showed me things I had never thought of. |
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| Catalog | Book | Book | Book | Book | Book | Book |
| Release date | 1999-10-12 | 2002-05 | 1998-07-10 | 1995-02-22 | 2003-04 | 1998-11 |
| Media | Paperback | Hardcover | Paperback | Paperback | Hardcover | Paperback |
| Number of pages | 240 | 391 | 400 | 270 | 240 | 272 |
| Ean | 9780440508380 | 9780944934296 | 9780060957179 | 9780300063172 | 9781576833070 | 9780944934210 |
| Book Isbn | 044050838X | 0944934293 | 0060957174 | 0300063172 | 1576833070 | 0944934218 |
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